Who Is In Your Tribe?

Who Is In Your Tribe? Cathy shares her experience of finding her "tribe" and how it impacted her other relationships.

Social media can be such an ugly glimpse into the heart of people. Recently, a plus size model was featured on the Sports Illustrated swimsuit addition. It made news and it brought out the worst in some people on social media. Some of the comments made about the model were cruel -- and unnecessary. We see it time and time again about people's looks, their clothes, and their beliefs. It seems everybody has an opinion and they feel entitled to share it, especially if it tears another down.

I've been taking stock of my own participation in this behavior -- not on social media, my momma raised me smarter than that -- but with my own friendships. I've been quick to judge or gossip about people. Really what was the big deal in a quick gossip session -- who is it hurting? Well, it was hurting me, limiting the person I could be.

The past year, I've spend a lot of time on the mat and in a room with some great people. The self-reflection on my yoga mat helped me to realize that putting that negative energy of gossip and judgement out in the universe was not healthy for me. As they say often in yoga, "energy flows where attention goes" and my attention when gossiping and judging wasn't focused on a positive place.

Fortunately, during my yoga teacher training, I met my tribe. This group of individuals got to meet the real me and the amazing thing was that they liked that girl, flaws and all. This group of individuals supported me and believed in me when I wouldn't believe in myself. I will always remember the excitement in the room the first time I finally held crow pose. I swear these people were more excited than I was -- and I was pretty excited.

See that's the great thing about finding your tribe -- they want to lift you up not tear you down. These individuals showed me how to be a good friend -- a true friend. So now I examine my relationships that I had before I met my tribe. I ask myself who is supporting me and who is trying to tear me down? Maybe they just aren't as supportive as they should be, concerned with only their own issues. Maybe they are judging and gossiping about others all the time. Whatever the issue, if they aren't challenging me to be better, I question the friendship. My relationships have changed. I'm closer now to some people than I was before. I see less of other friends and that's probably not a bad thing. I'm still not a perfect friend, but I'm trying.

It's often said that "your vibe attracts your tribe." I challenge you to take stock of your tribe. Are they people who bring out the best in you? Do you bring out the best in them? If not, maybe it's time to examine your "vibe."